keys, venison and brownies

How most annoying..unable to upload photo's. Grrrr. But its been a bit like that this week. Yesterday my car keys just stopped working. Just like that. It's going to cost stacks to get new key then I have to have it programmed. Managed to persuade Renault to give me the immobiliser code but had to provide IDand vehicle registration. Bit difficult as I can't get car to start so had to walk. Set off and began to wonder why I hadn't taken my bike, but then decided walk along lots of nice smelling hedgerows was very good. Very good indeed. Discovered amazing smell coming from plant - bit like mimosa reminded me of all my childhood summers and holidays on beaches and camping all rolled into one. Delightful. It wasn't till I got back home,armed with code and minus loads of money that I discovered amazing scent was actually coming from me. Yep. My suntan lotion. Can't stop sniffing myself. How funny. Thing two was enrolled into the Brownies on thursday. She is a Leprechaun. She had to say her Brownie promise, which goes like this. I Promise to do my best, to love my God, to serve my Queen and my country, to think of other people and to do a keep the Brownie Guide Law. When asked if she knew what the Brownie Guide Law was she said a very definite "no". So they had to help her out. Bless. At least she was honest. After key episode on friday and upon realisation that keys gonna cost me I developed major rage which I decided to take out on the decking. Cleared whole area in 3 seconds of various bits of furniture, compost and assortment of plants and pots. Scrubbed it by hand to get rid of general filth and then covered it in evil chemical decking restorer. Which I then had to remove by scrubbing by hand as I not owner of hosepipe. Many buckets of water and 2 hours later I ended up covered from head to foot in sweat and black debris and on verge of fainting - felt like I'd run a marathon. After much needed bath I hit the pub with the Prawn who got completely lashed and I had to virtually carry her home. I on other hand completely sober. Whys that I ponders to myself. Apart from that only other event of week was that I attempted to cook Venison for secret lover. Dinner totally ick. He ate it anyway. Firstly, couldn't find my pestle and mortar to crush peppercorns and halfheartedly whacked em to death with a rolling pin before rolling venison steak in them. End result was that I chocked about 6 times whilst eating it. My creation was Venison Wellington, you had to make this stuff called duelluxe which consists of thyme of which I put far too much in, chopped onions, garlic and mushrooms fried till soft. You put that on some pastry (had to chop most of it off and chuck it as pastry had developed freezer burn in freezer) on top of a layer of pate, well I hate pate and I know he does too so I decided to put a layer of sage and onion stuffing in instead. Big mistake. He also hates mushrooms. Dinner absolutely revolting. Not coooking that again. Have since found pestle and mortar in garden, thing two had taken it to crush leaves with.
Byeeee byeeee