cats, cakes, traffic wardens

Sooooooo what has today been like? Bundle of laughs, not exactly no. My Mother came to help me clear an area of my front room which has been dumping ground for yonks and we set to clearing it. Rather I held things up and she confirmed my fears that I should put them in landfill. Hate doing that so much. Also she took a suit that I've worn twice and cost £75 to Oxfam. Oh the pain. But its a size 8. Want to cry. Whilst doing this exercise Lily the new cat decided that the Wedding Cake that my Mother had brought round for me to ice and that was on the kitchen worktop unattended would make a nice snack. My mothers face went from happyish to stricken in split second. The words lead balloon spring to mind. Tried to lesson mortification by telling her that it was nothing compared to what happened to my mother in laws 60th birthday cake that had been left in my care for all of 24 hours. This did nothing to alleviate things. Told her we would patch it up and pretend it never happened but she insistant that we put some sort of marking on the eaten bit so that person cutting cake and giving it out knows which bit is dodgy. groan. Immediately after this little episode I headed of on school run, got to stupid school to see army of traffic wardens along front of school and all the way up the side. Heavy congestion everywhere due to fact that about 200 cars all arriving to collect children and traffic idyits not allowing anyone to stop. Car park full and duputy head not letting anyone in. Had moment of madness and decided to dig heels in. Stopped in middle of road in front of 2 traffic morons and refused to move point blank. Just sat there and sat there holding up all traffic in front and behind, they say I causing obstruction I say not, I just here to pick up child and where else was I meant to go. I then pulled in front of gates and refused to move till deputy head let me in...which he did ....eventually. Lots and lots and lots of cars all hooting...can't imagine why???

Will elaborate on the Froll situation. On saturday after I'd had a wicked night in the Purple Emporer with the Prawn I went to Hertford to collect Froll who had offered to put up Thing one's new furniture due to ex-husband in mourning over loss of close friend...thats another sad tale. Now when I collected Froll I was dead pleased and most happy but by time I dropped him back on sunday I'd just about had Froll up to eyeballs. Why...was it that he picked all the courgettes out of the lasagne that I cooked him? Was it the body odour - he clearly not wear deodorant? Was it that he used the cereal bowl that thing two had left in garden as an ashtray? Was it that he put the FUCKING drawer fronts on WONKY? Was it that he told me he thought I was most beautiful woman Ever? (incidently I like it the first time he said it but after hearing it 75 times it started wearing a bit thin) Was it the fact that he bought 2 bottles of wine and drank one and half of them himself leaving me sober and him pissed as a fart? Was it that he not watch film but talked all way through it and kept staring at me and asking me if I ok? Was it that he kept me awake all night I continually had to keep asking him to remove his poxy leg off my stomach? Was it that on date two he'd fixed it up for us to a)go running together b) go to Dirty Dancing as my christmas present c) go to Cape Verde d) go to an auction together to buy my next car d)have a week on his yacht with my children down the Thames even though I told him they not get on he assured me they would love it (noooo they would hate it sooooooooo much) e) that he would valet my car f)we would do something special together over christmas g) can't remember but there was more. Or was it that he kept helping himself to my mouth wash but due to his dyslexia he not read label that states quite clearly Shake to Activate (its dentadyl and it comes in two parts) so he just swilling the clove oil round in his mouth - and ended up smelling of sausage rolls. OH God it horrendous. Or was it that he kept helping himself to my fags, smoking about a third of one, putting it out and throwing it away. I guess I could cope with one or two of these things but not all of them at me in one go. There was lots of other stuff as well, but these are just the ones that spring to mind right now. So last night when he called me (OOOPs just remembered another one. He phoned his little boy and put on the campest high pitched voice I ever heard come from human being...don't ask me why but that major turn off.) ah yes last night when he called I told him I not sure what problem was, that I not able to put my finger on it but I not feeling right about us. When pressed I told him he come on too strong and it too much. He not impressed and say he delete me from phone. But he did thank me for letting him know early on. Hoooooray.
Thats all for now folks.
xx